As Valentine's Day approaches I thought I would post a short play about romance.
Poetry to My Ears is one of the last things I've written and has never been read or performed.
This shorter short play is based on real conversations I've overheard. And it makes me think about how much of my writing is lifted directly from life. I may be less of a writer than a recorder of real life with a pretty good memory for conversations.
Have a Happy Valentines Day!
Poetry to My Ear by Erin Browne
Characters:
Gretchen
Andrea
Soldier
Captain
Gretchen and Andrea sit cutting out hats for a small child’s birthday party.
Gretchen
What’s the most romantic thing you can think of?
Andrea
I can’t.
Gretchen
But there has to be something.
Andrea
I don’t know. He’s doing the dishes and then giving me a pedicure.
Gretchen
Yeah.
Andrea
What about you?
Gretchen
Don’t know.
Andrea
You do or your wouldn’t have asked.
Gretchen
I guess, like, seeing him more than once every couple of months, spending like a whole weekend with him would be amazing.
Andrea
You don’t get weekends?
Gretchen
Never.
Andrea
Hmmmm.
Gretchen
Too bad.
Andrea
Yeah.
Captain approaches Soldier who is tidying his bunk.
Captain
What is the purpose of this letter?
Soldier
Um, to please my wife Sir.
Captain
How did it end up in the mess hall?
Soldier
I must have left it there Sir, I’m sorry.
Captain
Well don’t let it happen again.
Soldier
I won’t Sir, I promise.
Captain
Don’t promise, just do it.
Soldier
Yes, Sir.
Captain
We can’t have this stuff getting into the hands of the other soldiers, they won’t forget they ever saw it like I will.
Soldier
Understood Sir.
Captain
Were you a poet at home soldier?
Soldier
No, Sir.
Captain
Why now?
Soldier
Absence makes the heart grow fonder, Sir?
Captain
I suppose.
Gretchen
You know what I really miss?
Andrea
What?
Gretchen
The smell of his sweat, the smell of him coming in after he’s cut the grass and being all sweaty and he sits on the couch and I get angry because he’s going to make the couch dirty and stinky but now sometimes I put my face right into the couch cushions to try to remember.
Andrea
That’s sweet.
Gretchen
But it doesn’t work.
Andrea
Why?
Gretchen
Febreze really works.
Andrea
Yeah.
Captain
So soldier.
Soldier
Sir?
Captain
What would I have to trade you for you to write a little something to my wife from me?
Soldier
Sir?
Captain
You know, to whip up a little poem for her.
Soldier
Uh, Sir I really only write for my wife Sir.
Captain
I could tell you a little bit about her and you could write her something like that there only about her and I could say it was from me and my wife would be very happy.
Soldier
Would she Sir?
Captain
She might be soldier and I’d like to make my wife happy without actually having to see her or spend any time on it.
Soldier
Well you’re spending time on this now Sir.
Captain
Don’t remind me soldier.
Soldier
Yes Sir.
Captain
So, will you do it or not?
Soldier
I guess I never really thought about writing for someone else, can I think about it?
Captain
No soldier, you can not. You will write this poem.
Soldier
Is that an order Sir?
Captain
Perhaps it is.
Soldier
Well then I guess I have to do it.
Captain
She has brown hair and is named Theresa, I’ll expect it at 800 hours soldier.
Soldier
Yes, Sir.
Captain
Thank you soldier.
Soldier
Don’t thank me until you get it Sir.
Captain
Well, just use this one for your wife as a guide.
Soldier
I’ll try sir.
Captain
Don’t try, just do it.
Soldier
Yes Sir.
Gretchen
You know it’s funny, he’s been sending me these poems.
Andrea
Really?
Gretchen
Yeah.
Andrea
He doesn’t seem like the type.
Gretchen
I know.
Andrea
Are they good?
Gretchen
No, they’re horrible.
Andrea
That’s sort of romantic though.
Gretchen
I kind of hate it.
Andrea
Come on, they can’t be that bad.
Gretchen
Look, if I’d wanted to marry a poet, I could have found one somewhere. I thought I married a man.
Andrea
Yeah.
Gretchen
Send them off to war and they get all soft on you.
Andrea
Funny.
Gretchen
I hope he’s not that way when he comes back.
Andrea
What way?
Gretchen
Poetic.
Andrea
Yeah.
